A Light That Never Burns Out: Honoring My Friend

In early 2021, I experienced a loss that forever changed my life. A close friend of mine—a veteran of the United States Army—died by suicide. He was the kind of person who carried light with him wherever he went, someone who loved to make others laugh and feel encouraged. He had a gift for cheering people up, and that gift was part of who he was at his core. Losing him was a pain I would not wish on my worst enemy.

I share this not to focus on prevention in this moment, but to raise awareness of the profound impact suicide has on the people left behind. Too often, suicide is spoken about in hushed tones, leaving those who grieve to wrestle with their pain alone. Awareness means bringing light into the shadows—acknowledging that this pain exists, that it ripples through families and communities, and that it matters. It means honoring the lives of those we have lost without reducing them to the way they left us.

My friend’s life mattered. His service mattered. His laughter, his warmth, and his presence in the lives of those who loved him mattered. And even though his earthly life came to an end, the light he shared continues to shine in the people who remember him, in the stories we tell, and in the way we continue to love others because of him. That light, his light, is one that never burns out.

As we talk about suicide, I hope we can create a culture that is not only about prevention, but also about compassion, awareness, and remembrance. Every life is a thread in a much larger story, and when a life is lost, the story shifts—but it does not end. We carry that person with us. Their light continues to glow.

I miss my friend very much. Sharing this is one small way to honor him and to stand alongside others who carry this kind of loss. May we all be more aware, more compassionate, and more willing to walk with each other through both the joy and the pain of life.

With compassion and remembrance,

Ashley